(Photograph by @nika)
At Vamigas we have been talking to many people about our Señora eras and Señora lives, and we're noticing there are many different definitions of the term.
For some folks it just means you have to be at home a lot, or married or with a partner, or already be a parent.
Some folks are even a bit shy to enter into their Señora eras, and are unsure when their inner señoras will call their name.
We want to stress how there's so much more to this era, and how important we think this concept is for our collective well-being.
Firstly, anyone can be a señora. There are no requirements as to what being one looks like.
Second, it's really about this idea that to have a happy life - particularly after you're making a hasty exit from your 20's - you shouldn't depend on the outside world to make you happy.
Why? Depending on external forces sets you up for a life where happiness requires you to buy more things, or go on expensive vacations every month. And there is nothing wrong with going on nice vacations or parties, but there is always a limit to those things. You can only buy so much.
And then what?
What's brought us the most happiness has been relying on simple things, like our lavender garden, or a really good cafecito, or a fun walk with the family, or reading a brilliant new book by yourself. Being happy without needing anything to buy or anywhere to go. This sets you up to to be on a really healthy path as you grow older because you truly won't need much to be happy.
To many of us, stepping into your señora is very much internal: being easy on yourself, allowing yourself to be who you are, finally, after so many years of trying to change yourself or somehow make yourself different for other people.
It's less about life stages and more about a way of being.
It's about going within to find your happiness.
Vamigas friend Amanda Martinez - the instructor over at The Class in Los Angeles and a talented MUA - put it nicely when we talked to her about her own Señora era.
"What Señora Era means to me…being present to myself, without the need to fix or hyper examine," she said. "My feelings are valid as they show up and as they leave. I can actually experience myself in the soft intimacy of my being rather than the tension of my thoughts."
How does Amanda know she's living her best señora life?
Less reaction, more curiosity. Self permission slips (I actually write myself permission slips). Rest is priority. Authentic conversations over good food beat a wild night more often than not. Cafecito on my front porch watching my fur babies run around with my love. Belly laughs and my belly in general. My panza. Body Love. I hold her a lot these days. I tell her kind things.
And we just think there is nothing in the world better than moments with those panza laughs.